Friday, 31 January 2014

Hitler and Rob Ford

Updated: Sept 1/2014: see last video below: Ford returns from rehab

Blankety-blank YouTube. I keep posting videos then somebody takes them down. Copyright infringement? Bad conscious? I keep having to check postings to verify whether or not my embedded videos are still functioning. Ha, ha. Geesh, how hard is it to break the law?

On a previous posting of videos about Rob Ford, I wanted to include one of the following but the video I had selected disappeared. I couldn't find a copy so I removed the reference completely from the posting. I have now found something else so I'm going to try again. Keep in mind these videos may disappear too. With YouTube, one never knows.

The Internet has a number of parodies based on the 2004 German/Italian/Austrian war film Downfall. (See info in References.) It has been used for all sorts of things and is just hilarious. When I saw this parody about Rob Ford, I was laughing so hard I was in tears.

Published on Nov 17, 2013 by Crapola
Hitler rant on Rob Ford fiasco



Published on Nov 17, 2013 by Bryan K
Rob Ford is creating headaches for Hitler



Published on Nov 8, 2013 by Fegel Antics
Hitler phones Toronto Mayor Rob Ford about Crack Cocaine



And, of course, I couldn't resist.

Published on Nov 15, 2013 by Andy N.
Mayor Rob Ford: The Colbert Report Toronto "I've got more than enough to eat at home."
"It kind of makes you kind of nostalgic for the crack now, doesn't it Toronto?"



Published on Jul 25, 2014 by Nathan Ng
Hitler learns of Rob Ford's return from rehab



References

Huffington Post - Dec 3/2013
Rob Ford Now Cover Too Similar To Time's Hitler Cover?
Toronto's NOW Magazine is under fire for a Rob Ford cover that many are comparing to a Time Magazine cover featuring Hitler.

my blog: Rob Ford inspires yet another Top Ten - Feb 8/2014
David Letterman: Top Ten Things Rob Ford Might Be Saying In This Video

my blog: Rob Ford: a new high, a new low, and a new word - Jan 26/2014
Bumbaclot? All spoken in a Jamaican accent? In defence of Rob Ford, my displays of public intoxication took place a long time ago before the Internet. Then again, I wasn't holding public office which one normally associates with a higher standard of decorum. VIDEOS

my blog: Rob Ford: Alcoholic Thinking and a Gullible Public - Dec 9/2013 (Updated)
I'm not going to talk about drugs and I'm not going to talk about the comedic fodder for late night talk shows. I am, however, going to talk about the hyperbolic bravado of political leaders vying for my vote who are counting on me being naive and uninformed.

Google video search: Hitler and Rob Ford

Wikipedia: Downfall (film)
Downfall (German: Der Untergang) is a 2004 German/Italian/Austrian epic war film directed by Oliver Hirschbiegel, depicting the final ten days of Adolf Hitler's life in his Berlin bunker and Nazi Germany in 1945.

Parodies
One scene in the film, in which Hitler launches into a furious tirade upon finally realizing that the war is truly lost, has become a staple of internet videos. In these videos, the original audio of Ganz's voice is retained, but new subtitles are added so that he now seems to be reacting instead to some setback in present-day politics, sports, popular culture, or everyday life. Other scenes from various portions of the film have been parodied in the same manner, notably the scenes where Hitler orders Otto Günsche to find Gruppenfuhrer Hermann Fegelein, and where Hitler discusses a counterattack against advancing Soviet forces with his generals. By 2010, there were thousands of such parodies, including many in which a self-aware Hitler is incensed that people keep making Downfall parodies.

Make your own Hitler video: http://downfall.jfedor.org/

Know Your Meme: Downfall / Hitler Reacts
Example Hitler parodies

Published on Mar 22, 2012 by Spire Skyscraper
The Downfall of Rob Ford's Subway Vision
A fan of Toronto Mayor Rob Ford takes the news of his failure to extend the Sheppard Subway rather poorly.


2014-01-31

Site Map - William Quincy BelleFollow me on Twitter

Thursday, 30 January 2014

Janet Jackson: Rhythm Nation



[spoken]
We are a nation with no geographic boundaries
bound together through our beliefs
we are like-minded individuals
sharing a common vision
pushing toward a world
rid of color-lines.

[sung]
With music by our side
To break the color lines
Let's work together
To improve our way of life

Join voices in protest
To social injustice
A generation full of courage
Come forth with me

People of the world today
Are we looking for a better way of life (Sing)
We are a part of the rhythm nation (Whoo)

People of the world unite
Strength in numbers we can get it right one time (Sing it up)
We are a part of the rhythm nation

This is the test
No struggle no progress
Lend a hand to help
Your brother do his best

Things are getting worse
We have to make them better
It's time to give a damn
Let's work together come on

People of the world today
Are we looking for a better way of life (Sing)
We are a part of the rhythm nation (Rhythm)

People of the world unite
Strength in numbers we can get it right one time (Sing it up)
We are a part of the rhythm nation
Everybody

People of the world today (Rhythm)
Are we looking for a better way of life (Rhythm)
We are a part of the rhythm nation (Yeah yeah everybody say it)

People of the world unite (Rhythm)
Strength in numbers we can get it right one time (Rhythm)
We are a part of the rhythm nation (Well well yeah)

Bass (x19)
Nasty!

Say it people
Say it children
Say it if you want a better way of life

Say it people
Say it children
Say it if you want a better way of life

Nasty!
Nasty!
Nasty!
Bass (x19)

Everybody say it

People of the world today
Are we looking for a better way of life (Sing)
We are a part of the rhythm nation (Whoo)

People of the world unite
Strength in numbers we can get it right one time (Sing it up)
We are a part of the rhythm nation (Rhythm)

People of the world today
Are we looking for a better way of life (Sing)
We are a part of the rhythm nation (Whoo)

People of the world unite
Strength in numbers we can get it right one time (Sing it up now)
We are a part of the rhythm nation
(Rhythm nation sing the story)

Rhy-thm Nation
(Yeah well sing it again)
Rhy-thm Nation
(You know you here me)
(Rhythm nation sing the story)
Rhy-thm Nation
Say it for the babies
Rhythm nation sing it
Say it for the babies
Say it for the people
Rhythm nation sing it
Say it for the babies
Say it for the people
Say it for the children
Say it for the babies
Say it for the people
Say it for the children
Say it for the babies
Say it for me
Say it for me
Say it for me now
Rhy-thm Nation


References

Uploaded on Jun 16, 2009 by JanetJacksonVEVO

Wikipedia: Rhythm Nation
"Rhythm Nation" is a song by American pop entertainer Janet Jackson, released as the second single from Rhythm Nation 1814. Written and produced by Jackson and Jam & Lewis, the song's militant, innovative production combines elements of dance pop and industrial music with flourishes of hip-hop, rock, new jack swing, and funk. The song's lyrical content speaks about unification and racial harmony, also focusing on the theme of forming a common identity or "nation" within groups of various ethnic backgrounds and cultures, with its title developed by Jackson in response to various tragedies and crimes reported in the media.

Music video
The famous black-and-white, military-inspired "Rhythm Nation" video was directed by Dominic Sena in August 1989. It was the finale in the Rhythm Nation 1814 Film, following videos for "Miss You Much" and "The Knowledge". Famous for its high-octane choreography in an abandoned factory, the video won an Best Choreography and was nominated for Best Dance Video at the MTV Video Music Awards, where Jackson also received the MTV Video Vanguard Award for her massive contributions to pop culture and entertainment. "Rhythm Nation" ranked thirty-seven on VH1's "Greatest 100 Videos" and forty-four on MTV's "100 Greatest Videos Ever Made". The video features a young Tyrin Turner. Sena was a relatively unknown director at the time, and the success of "Rhythm Nation" allowed him to later direct blockbuster films such as Swordfish, Gone in 60 Seconds and Season of the Witch.


Wikipedia: Janet Jackson's Rhythm Nation 1814
Janet Jackson's Rhythm Nation 1814 is the fourth studio album by American recording artist Janet Jackson, released on September 19, 1989, by A&M Records. Despite demands from label executives for material similar to her previous album, Control (1986), she insisted on creating a concept album addressing social injustice.

Wikipedia: Janet Jackson
Janet Damita Jo Jackson (born May 16, 1966) is an American recording artist and actress. Known for a series of sonically innovative, socially conscious and sexually provocative records, as well as elaborate stage shows, television appearances, and film roles, she has been a prominent figure in popular culture since the early 1970s. [She is the] youngest child of the Jackson family.

official web site: Janet Jackson

2014-01-30

Site Map - William Quincy BelleFollow me on Twitter

Wednesday, 29 January 2014

Grace Jones: Slave to the Rhythm



Work all day, as men who know,
Wheels must turn to keep, to keep the flow,

Build on up, don't break the chain,
Sparks will fly, when the whistle blows,

Never stop the action,
Keep it up, keep it up,

Work to the rhythm,
Live to the rhythm,
Love to the rhythm,
Slave to the rhythm,

Axe to wood, in ancient time,
Man machine, power line,

Fires burn, heart beats strong,
Sing out loud, the chain gang song,

Never stop the action,
Keep it up, keep it up,

Breath to the rhythm,
Dance to the rhythm,
Work to the rhythm,
Live to the rhythm,
Love to the rhythm,
Slave to the rhythm.


References

Published on Jan 28, 2013 by Hans Hoppenbrouwers

Wikipedia: Slave to the Rhythm (song)
"Slave to the Rhythm" is a 1985 hit song performed by Grace Jones.

Music video
The music video for "Slave to the Rhythm" features the hit single version of the song, billed as "Ladies and Gentlemen: Miss Grace Jones" in the album track listing. It largely consists of previously seen footage, using excerpts from Jones' previously released music videos, "My Jamaican Guy" and "Living My Life", as well as the A One Man Show documentary. Included are also still pictures of some of the singer's most iconic looks and the Citroën CX TV advertisement. No new footage with personal Grace Jones appearance was filmed for the video. The clip features a spoken voice-overs from Ian McShane, extracted from tracks "Jones the Rhythm" and "Operattack". The music video was directed by Jean-Paul Goude, Jones' partner at the time. There are several different versions of the video.


Wikipedia: Slave to the Rhythm
Slave to the Rhythm is the seventh studio album by Grace Jones, released on 28 October 1985 by Island Records. The concept album, produced by Trevor Horn, went on to become one of Jones' greatest album triumphs commercially and spawned her biggest hit, "Slave to the Rhythm".

Wikipedia: Grace Jones
Beverly Grace Jones (born 19 May 1948) is a Jamaican singer, actress and model.

official web site: Grace Jones

2014-01-29

Site Map - William Quincy BelleFollow me on Twitter

Tuesday, 28 January 2014

John Fugelsang: We're in the golden age of slut-shaming

John Fugelsang took over hosting the political talk show Viewpoint on Currrent TV from Eliot Spitzer from January 6, 2013 until the end of its run on August 15, 2013. The following video is apparently from the August 1, 2013 edition of Viewpoint.

"We are now though, my friends, in the golden age of slut-shaming—a time when the culture, the media and the men demand women sexualize themselves to prove their value to society, but then punish those women if they dare to actually enjoy it."

"It’s used to smear rape victims, women who want birth control, women who like sex as much as men or just women who choose to have agency over their own intimate lives. Retrograde hypocrisy, usually perpetuated by males who crave female sexuality, as long as they can control it."



Published on Oct 22, 2013 by FroggyTWrite
We're in the golden age of slut-shaming...
"We are now though, my friends, in the golden age of slut-shaming—a time when the culture, the media and the men demand women sexualize themselves to prove their value to society, but then punish those women if they dare to actually enjoy it."— John Fugelsang


References

Pinterest: Maureen Perry moknowsx2: John Fugelsang

Wikipedia: John Fugelsang
John Joseph Fugelsang (born September 3, 1969) is an American actor, television personality and comedian.

Wikipedia: Viewpoint
Viewpoint was a political talk show on Current TV. Formerly known as Viewpoint with Eliot Spitzer, it was hosted by former New York Governor Eliot Spitzer until January 6, 2013. After that, it was hosted by John Fugelsang. Viewpoint began airing on March 30, 2012 as a replacement to Keith Olbermann, who was dismissed from his show in the same time slot. ... The show aired its final episode on August 15, 2013.

Wikipedia: Slut-shaming
Slut shaming (also hyphenated, as slut-shaming) is a concept in philosophy on sexuality. It is a neologism used to describe the act of making any person feel guilty or inferior for certain sexual behaviors or desires that deviate from traditional or orthodox gender expectations, or that which may be considered to be contrary to natural or religious law. Some examples of behaviors over which women are said to be "slut-shamed" include: violating accepted dress codes by dressing in sexually provocative ways, requesting access to birth control, having premarital or casual sex, or being raped or sexually assaulted.

my blog: Rush Limbaugh: That's spelled with one F and one U - Mar 14/2012
Recently, the world has been atwitter on Twitter and other social media commenting left, right and centre about one Rush Hudson Limbaugh. Of course, it is easy to pile on by calling him an anal orifice or a Neanderthal or a meany... (I consult my notes) oops, that's a f**kin' meany... however I can't help feeling there is more, much more not just to this particular story, but to what the story represents. This is the tip of the iceberg.

2014-01-28

Site Map - William Quincy BelleFollow me on Twitter

Monday, 27 January 2014

Frankie Goes To Hollywood: Relax



Oh oh
Wee-ell-Now!

Relax don't do it
When you want to go to it
Relax don't do it
When you want to come
Relax don't do it
When you want to come
When you want to come

Relax don't do it
When you want to to go to it
Relax don't do it
When you want to come
Relax don't do it
When you want to suck to it
Relax don't do it
When you want to come
Come-oh oh oh

But shoot it in the right direction
Make making it your intention-ooh yeah
Live those dreams
Scheme those schemes
Got to hit me
Hit me
Hit me with those laser beams

I'm coming
I'm coming-yeah

Relax don't do it
When you want to go to it
Relax don't do it
When you want to come

Relax don't do it
When you want to suck to it
Relax don't do it (love)
When you want to come
When you want to come
When you want to come
Come-huh

Get it up
The scene of love
Oh feel it

Relax
Higher higher

Hey-
Pray


References

Uploaded on Jun 21, 2011 by Kontor.TV

Wikipedia: Relax (song)
"Relax" is the debut single by Frankie Goes to Hollywood, released in the UK by ZTT Records in 1983... "Relax" finally reached number one on the UK singles chart on 24 January 1984, ultimately becoming one of the most controversial and most commercially successful records of the entire decade.

[The record label ZTT] intentionally courted scandal with the promotion of "Relax". ZTT initiated the ad campaign for "Relax" with two quarter-page ads in the British music press. The first ad featured images of Rutherford in a sailor cap and a leather vest, and Johnson with a shaved head and rubber gloves. The images were accompanied by the phrase "ALL THE NICE BOYS LOVE SEA MEN".

Videos
The first official video for "Relax", directed by Bernard Rose and set in a S&M themed gay nightclub, featuring the bandmembers accosted by buff leathermen, a glamorous drag queen, and an obese admirer dressed up as a Roman emperor, was allegedly banned by MTV and the BBC, prompting the recording of a second video directed by Godley and Creme in early 1984, featuring the group performing with the help of laser beams. However, after the second video was made the song was banned completely by the BBC, meaning that neither video was ever broadcast on any BBC music programmes.


Wikipedia: Frankie Goes to Hollywood
Frankie Goes to Hollywood (FGTH) were a British band popular in the mid-1980s. The group was fronted by Holly Johnson (vocals), with Paul Rutherford (vocals, keyboards), Peter Gill (drums, percussion), Mark O'Toole (bass guitar), and Brian Nash (guitar).

2014-01-27

Site Map - William Quincy BelleFollow me on Twitter

Sunday, 26 January 2014

Rob Ford: a new high, a new low, and a new word

Bumbaclot? All spoken in a Jamaican accent? In defence of Rob Ford, my displays of public intoxication took place a long time ago before the Internet. Then again, I wasn't holding public office which one normally associates with a higher standard of decorum. While in some ways, I feel sorry for Rob (it is embarrassing having a meltdown in public) I consider this to exemplify the incorrect thinking of his far right politics. I didn't vote for Rob because I never felt his numbers added up. He kept saying that two plus two equals five. It didn't make sense. I can see why a naive public would jump on the "Stop The Gravy Train" bandwagon (it is catchy slogan) but reality hasn't proven to be even remotely like that and his bombastic hyperbolic politics have completely muddied the waters as to the real issues.

Urban Dictionary: bumbaclot
A cloth or rag used to wipe ones anal region. However, most Jamaicans use it as a substitute for the word f*ck to express anger or surprise.

Toronto Life - Jan 21/2014
Bizarre new Rob Ford video appears to show the mayor mumbling incoherently in Jamaican patois by Steve Kupferman
The extremely weird video above appeared on YouTube earlier today. Obviously recorded on a cell phone, it appears to show Rob Ford standing in a fast-food restaurant—some on Twitter are speculating that it’s Steak Queen, an Etobicoke eatery that’s a known favourite of the mayor’s—and mumbling incoherently to a group of men. What he’s saying isn’t entirely clear, but he seems to be attempting Jamaican patois.

Here’s an attempted transcript of the video... It seems like the substance of Ford’s spiel is a complaint about his treatment by Toronto Police, and particularly by chief Bill Blair, who presided over a months-long investigation of the mayor and his associates.

FORD: Cocksucker. Fucking Chief Blair […] Ciao, bonhomme. That mother chase me around for five months, brother. Bumbaclot, man. Hi sir. Well, me and him, we’re, uh, ba ba ba, […] Leave me alone. Five months, man. And him try to tell me, bro, we’re countersurveilling the guy, you know what I mean? He’s hiding here, I’m going to hide here. I’m going to […] Fuck off. You know how much money that cost them? I said bro, just cut some. “No! No money, no money, no money.” Ciao! Ah, bumbaclot, man. I said, “You know what? You’re […]” I swear to God, man. Then, honestly, man—

UNIDENTIFIED MALE VOICE 1: Sir, that’s to go, man.

FORD: Seriously shit, man. Serious shit, bro.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE VOICE 2: All we know, all we know, all we know is that [...]

FORD: No, seriously, you know.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE VOICE 2: This guy deserves to be even better than Prime Minister Harper.

FORD: No no no! I don’t pull shit. I’m a straight-up guy, you know? Who—who was in THC? Who go to James Town, and Jane and Finch, and then Malvern on the […] Then, fuck. […]

Published on Jan 21, 2014 by Toronto TheCity
New Video of Toronto Mayor Rob Ford Drunk, Swearing in Jamaican Patois? Bumbaclot



Is the fodder for late night talk show hosts back?

Published on Jan 24, 2014 by Elyas News Tv
Jimmy Kimmel happy to have Rob Ford back



Is there anything else which could demonstrate how Toronto's mayor is now truly on the world stage? Yes, he is now a question on the television game show Jeopardy.

Alex Trebek: "In 2013, Rob Ford, mayor of this 4th-largest city in North America first said he smoked weed, not crack...then, yes, ok, crack, too."

Contestant: "What is Toronto?"

Published on Jan 25, 2014 by GEEK TECHNOLOGY NEWS
Rob Ford 'Jeopardy!' Question Pokes Fun At Mayor's Crack Use
Rob Ford's behaviour has raised a lot of questions over the years, but now he's actually become the question. Toronto's controversial mayor was the subject of a Jeopardy! question on Thursday night. "What is Toronto?" said everybody.



References

my blog: Hitler and Rob Ford - Jan 31/2014
Parody videos based on Downfall, a 2004 German/Italian/Austrian epic war film.

my blog: Rob Ford: Alcoholic Thinking and a Gullible Public - Dec 9/2013 (Updated)
I'm not going to talk about drugs and I'm not going to talk about the comedic fodder for late night talk shows. I am, however, going to talk about the hyperbolic bravado of political leaders vying for my vote who are counting on me being naive and uninformed.

my blog: Rob Ford and His Legacy: Okay, now I'm scared. - Dec 12/2013
What's the right answer? Now I'm sure your immediate response would be, "What's the question?" And therein lies our collective problem. People keep spouting off about their right answer when subsequent analysis concludes those people didn't understand the question. Understand it? Heck, you could say they were answering a completely different question.

Wikipedia: Rob Ford
Robert Bruce "Rob" Ford (born May 28, 1969) is a Canadian politician and businessman. He is the sixty-fourth and current Mayor of Toronto, Ontario, Canada.

2014-01-26

Site Map - William Quincy BelleFollow me on Twitter

Saturday, 25 January 2014

Simon & Garfunkel: A Hazy Shade Of Winter



Time, time, time, see what's become of me
While I looked around
For my possibilities
I was so hard to please
But look around, leaves are brown
And the sky is a hazy shade of winter

Hear the salvation army band
Down by the riverside, it's bound to be a better ride
Than what you've got planned
Carry your cup in your hand
And look around, leaves are brown now
And the sky is a hazy shade of winter

Hang on to your hopes, my friend
That's an easy thing to say, but if your hope should pass away
It's simply pretend
That you can build them again
Look around, the grass is high
The fields are ripe, it's the springtime of my life

Ahhh, seasons change with the scenery
Weaving time in a tapestry
Won't you stop and remember me
At any convenient time
Funny how my memory slips while looking over manuscripts
Of unpublished rhyme
Drinking my vodka and lime

Ilook around, leaves are brown now
And the sky is a hazy shade of winter

Look around, leaves are brown
There's a patch of snow on the ground...

Look around, leaves are brown
There's a patch of snow on the ground...

Look around, leaves are brown
There's a patch of snow on the ground...


References

Uploaded on Feb 27, 2010 by kylecrazyford

Wikipedia: A Hazy Shade of Winter
"A Hazy Shade of Winter" is a song written by Paul Simon, recorded and released by Simon & Garfunkel in 1966, and then included on their 1968 album, Bookends (although it also appeared on their Live from New York City, 1967). It peaked at #13 on the Billboard Hot 100[1] making it the second highest-charting song on the album after "Mrs. Robinson", which reached #1 when it was released on the back of its inclusion on the soundtrack of The Graduate.

The Bangles version
In 1987, The Bangles were approached to record a song for the soundtrack of the film Less Than Zero. They chose to record a cover of "A Hazy Shade of Winter," a song they had been performing since their early days as a band. When released as a single in November 1987, "Hazy Shade of Winter" became a huge hit, surpassing the popularity of the original version, peaking at #2 on the Billboard Hot 100, only behind "Could've Been" by Tiffany, and also #11 in the UK. It was also a hit around Europe.


YouTube: The Bangles - Hazy Shade Of Winter

Wikipedia: Bookends
Bookends is the fourth studio album by Simon & Garfunkel, released on April 3, 1968. It was produced by Paul Simon, Roy Halee and Art Garfunkel.

Bookends was Simon & Garfunkel's concept album, with the first side following the views of age, while the second side contained unused songs intended for The Graduate soundtrack, the soundtrack from Mike Nichols' 1967 hit film The Graduate.

Bookends was a #1 hit on Billboard's (North America) Pop Albums chart, as well as in the UK. Four singles charted: "A Hazy Shade of Winter," "At the Zoo," "Fakin' It" and "Mrs. Robinson," which peaked at #13, #16 and #23 and #1, respectively.

In 2003, the TV network VH1 named Bookends the 93rd greatest album of all time. In 2003, the album was ranked number 233 on Rolling Stone magazine's list of the 500 greatest albums of all time.

Wikipedia: Simon & Garfunkel
Simon & Garfunkel was an American duo consisting of singer-songwriter Paul Simon and singer Art Garfunkel. The duo rose to fame in 1965, largely on the strength of the hit single "The Sound of Silence".

2014-01-25

Site Map - William Quincy BelleFollow me on Twitter

Friday, 24 January 2014

Gigolos, Escorts, and This Is About Me.

Showtime: Television Network. Gigolos: American reality television series about the lives of five male escorts in Las Vegas. Vin Armani: one of the stars of Gigolos (Season 1-present); Philosophy major and software engineer. The Good Men Project: online magazine devoted to "enlightened masculinity."

On January 22, 2014, GMP published the piece "I Am a Gigolo" by Armani in which he explains his profession, what he offers women and why women hire him.

At first blush, anyone would connect gigolo to escort to prostitution, that is, sex for money. Is there anything else which is as morally condemned never mind being illegal just about everywhere? However, Mr. Armani states right up front:

The most common misconception about my profession is that it is "all about sex."

What? It's not all about sex? Then what in heaven's name are we talking about? What else could there be? Whether it's a gigolo or an escort, it has to be about sex and why would anybody pay for sex? But he's saying it's not "all about sex". This is confusing.

An escort, at the top of his (or her) profession, provides a service of almost incomparable psychological worth.

Get out of here. Isn't a "happy ending" of incomparable physical worth? But wait, he said it's not "all about sex." Armani's article links to a charming story by a 5'1" woman who was tipping the scales at nearly 300 pounds. Ms. Smith is told by her doctor she needs to turn her life around. It is a question of her health. She does so in a most unusual manner: she dates male escorts. (This entire story is eye-opening. Read it all.)

xojane - Mar 8/2013
It Happened To Me Contest Entry: I Lost 98 Pounds And Fell In Love By Dating Escorts by Heather Smith
I started the formal plan in September 2011 and by April I had fallen completely in love with... myself. They helped me work through my body image issues in a way that no therapist ever could. They helped me find my inner strength and confidence. By rediscovering my sexual self and the power that comes with it, I became an improved woman in all areas of my life.

Going into this, I had no idea how fucked up I was in regards to men/women relations, sex, or what true intimacy was. They taught me so much about myself and relationships that I’m writing a book about it.

The mental, the physical, the emotional -- it’s all connected and requires balance. I hate that we live in a culture that de-emphasizes, nay, disapproves of the potential benefits of sex outside of a heavy, committed monogamous relationship.

I’m still a “fat” girl, a respectable size 12-14 depending on the label and cut but I don’t feel nor behave like a fat girl any longer. I’ve arrived at body acceptance. I’m dating “civilians” again, confidently.

What exactly did Ms. Smith get out of her encounters with male escorts? Did she have sexual relations with these men? The answer seems to be yes. However, it would seem Ms. Smith got far more out of this than just an orgasm. She seems to have found her self-confidence; she has found purpose; and most importantly, she has accepted herself. How curious. In our culture, sex is very much vilified but Ms. Smith's story lends weight to the idea that our sexuality is an integral part of the human existence and that sex has therapeutic powers: the power to uplift us, heal us, and make us better people. Is somebody like Mr. Armani a sexual surrogate?

Wikipedia: Sexual surrogate
Typical problems:
* Trouble with intimacy
* Lack of confidence
* Communication problems
* Dating anxiety
* Sexual inhibitions
Since many sexual problems are psychological rather than physical, communication plays a key role in the therapeutic process between a patient and the sex surrogate.

What is the ultimate goal? Mr. Armani:

When we think of our ideal relationship, most of us envision a partner who arouses us with their physical presence, stimulates us with their mental prowess, demonstrates affection and attention to our needs (at times before we know what we need), and accepts us for who we are –- flaws and all -– without passing any judgement.

Without passing any judgement. When was the last time you had that experience?

Time with a talented professional companion creates a space where clients can feel free to lay bare their biggest fears and insecurities, knowing that the escort’s primary goal is that client’s happiness. In terms of therapeutic value, a great escort beats a psychologist any day of the week. Hell, when was the last time your shrink held you in their arms? Would you want them to anyway?

What do women want? What do men want?
This may seem like a men are from Mars, women are from Venus type of thing, but I can't help feeling there are more commonalities to the two sexes than we realise. Our culture has instilled in all of us traditions, morals, and gender-based roles that we do not necessarily understand or are even aware of. We carry on doing what we're doing without ever questioning if what we're doing is valid and if there is another way of doing things.

In my posting "Veronica Monet: Sex Secrets of Escorts: What Men Really Want", I spoke about this former escort and her accumulated wisdom of dealing with nearly two thousand clients over the span of her career.

I learned that when you take his clothes off and provide him with one of the most emotionally moving orgasms of his life, a man will show you that he is not all that different from most women. Men, too, want to be held while they cum and will cry during an internal (prostate) orgasm. There is softness and a desire to be nurtured which I never saw in men until I became a prostitute. I literally went from hating men and the oppression they represented to me at that time, to loving men and feeling regret that we live in a world culture which demands that men sublimate their feminine side in preference of appearing in control.

Final Word
Sex for money: bad, bad, bad. But is it about the sex? Is there more to it than just sex? Is sex itself a bigger part of our lives, our ego, and our confidence? A female commentator responded to the original article by Vin Armani:

I think he makes a lot of sense. If I'd dated more -- a lot more-- after divorce #1 I wouldn't have had divorce #2.

We can see a psychiatrist and talk. We can visit a massage therapist and take care of some of our physical problems. But who takes care of sex? Who takes care of personal confidence? Sexual confidence? Feeling good about yourself and feeling good about your body? If I want to play golf, I must learn a skill and practice. If I want to ballroom dance, I must learn a skill and practice. If I want to date, have sex, possibly marry, are there skills I must learn and practice? I've said this elsewhere as an observation of an oddity in our culture. Before I am allowed to drive, I must pass a test and get a licence. Before I am allowed to perform brain surgery, I must go to university, medical school, intern, and pass a series of stringent exams. But anybody, absolutely anybody with no instruction, without ever proving via an exam they have the requisite knowledge, is permitted to date, have sex, and get married. Would we all be better people if we learned the skills and practiced? Would we all have better relationships, better sex, and better marriages if we didn't blindly rush forward but took the time to learn the skills and practice?


References

The Good Men Project - Jan 22/2014
I Am a Gigolo by Vin Armani
What’s life like for a guy getting paid to service women? Vin Armani, in his own words.

Wikipedia: Gigolos
Gigolos is an American reality television series about the lives of five male escorts in Las Vegas. The series follows the men, all employees of the same escort agency, through their daily lives and interactions with each other. Cameras also follow the escorts on their appointments with women, including their sexual activity. The series debuted on the premium cable channel Showtime on April 7, 2011.

official web site: Gigolos

YouTube: Vin Armani
Tao Of The Gigolo: Brock Jones hosts an in-depth interview with Vin Armani on the topics of love, sex, and relationships.

2014-01-24

Site Map - William Quincy BelleFollow me on Twitter

Thursday, 23 January 2014

I Went to Cooking School

Yes, that even makes me want to exclaim, "What!?!" Considering that I hate cooking and have just about zip in the culinary department, a class about kitchen skills is the last place you'd expect to find me. After all, I was the laughing stock of family and friends for having admitted at the age of 45, I would occasionally eat Pizza Pockets. (Oh God, how I love a microwave.) But he who laughs last laughs best. While everybody derided me for this questionable choice in nourishment, it turned out that after everybody came back with the results of their annual physical, yours truly clocked in with the best cholesterol score. This is where I stick my tongue out and go, "Nah, nah." Obviously, people were measuring me based on my one peccadillo as opposed to looking at the entire picture of good eating and regular exercise. Excuse me while I stick my tongue out again and go, "Nah, nah."

This past Christmas, I received a gift certificate for a cooking class. Since I am now divorced and living on my own, this good Samaritan thought I could do with something inspirational in the hopes I would be motivated in the kitchen. While I can't say this one class is going to transform me into a part-time wunderkind with a spatula, it was an amusing couple of hours.

I had no idea of just what this cooking class was about. It was put on the local branch of a large grocery store chain under the brand President's Choice. I was imagining a bunch of people pairing off to work on producing their own dishes under the watchful eye of an expert and I told my Good Samaritan that my target for the evening was to "not set the place on fire." It turned out that this was a cooking demonstration: the audience sits and watches the chef prepare the meal.

Being something of a shy introvert, I hesitated even going. The irony of such an admission is that it turned out I was the most spirited participant there. The audience consisted of nine people. While everyone shuffled in and took their seat, I walked in and immediately went up to the front to shake hands with Chef Greg Willis and exchange a few friendly words. It turned out we came from the same area so had a few points in common. Twenty years ago he had his own restaurant and I was sure I had visited it at one time or another.

Throughout the demonstration, Chef Willis explained what he was doing and spoke about foods and cooking techniques interspersed with personal anecdotes of his professional and personal life. Out of the nine people, I seemed to be the only one interacting with him. Five people never uttered a single word during the entire two hour session. The other three made one or two comments. I suppose one could have asked me to shut up, but after a while it almost seemed as though Chef would look up directly at me while he was talking. It was at times as if the two of us were having a friendly conversation with eight witnesses. Okay, while in one way it may seem like I'm a talker, I've been on the other side of the lectern and I know anybody up front and centre does appreciate getting some feedback. Besides, in this small and more intimate setting, it seemed more conducive to having a conversation as opposed to just sitting there silently watching what chef was doing.

The title of this class was "A Wee Taste of Bonnie Old Scotland." This consisted of creamy leek-potato soup, braised greens with white beans and rosemary, roasted leg of lamb, followed by Scotch apple pudding. All in all, it was a good meal. Considering the class started at 7pm, it wasn't until 8:30pm that we started with the soup and I commented we were all eating in a European style, that is, later in the evening. Chef added, "Or as a New York theatre crowd" referring to those who eat after the early show. Whatever the case, I was glad I decided to have an early hors d'oeuvre to stave off my hunger pangs. That fancy-pants sounding hors d'oeuvre was a slice of pizza. In fact, I used that joke during the course. Chef was explaining how simple dishes can be "jazzed up" with various ingredients, spices, or even a sprig of parsley and I noted how giving a descriptive name in French seemed to make anything more exotic. Chuckles all around.

Afterwards, the business person in me thought about the money. My ticket was $30 so $30 times 9 people equals $270. The class was two hours long and everybody got a meal consisting of soup, an entrée, and dessert. Does the store look at this as a lost leader? Attract people in for the cooking class and hope they decide to shop at the store? According to the store's representative who also acted as the chef's assistant, the store hosts these cooking classes on a regular basis and there are people who show up as repeat customers. There's a lunchtime special for $10 which gets you a one hour class and a lunch. Not a bad deal, I guess.

Final Word
Would I do it again? Maybe. But it's not at the top of my list. I enjoyed the meal; I enjoyed an unusual, once-in-a-lifetime experience but it's a cup of tea I don't want to have on a regular basis. I have no intention of developing a skill to whip together a bouillabaisse or knock you out with an award winning apple crumble. Yes, I enjoy eating but I don't have the patience to spend the time necessary to perfect skills to go beyond the basics such as scrambled eggs and toast. I'm sure you're now chuckling about what I could possibly be eating then. Am I subsisting on Pizza Pockets? After my 2012 sports injury, I joined a gym, spent some time with a trainer, and researched diet to fight my way back to good health. I made up a spreadsheet and filled it with all sorts of foods broken down by calories, fat, protein, sodium content, carbs, etc. and mapped out a diet as per the recommendations of various experts on the Web. I know exactly what I'm eating and it is anything but fast-food or microwavable food. Last year, the government set a new guideline for our daily intake of salt consisting of 1500 mg. per day. Most of the time, I am not surpassing that amount. (FYI: Since then, they have raised it to 2000 mg. For a long time, it was 2400 mg per day and I would add here that ofttimes the average person is consuming 3500 mg. No wonder heart disease is up.)

I'll close with a funny story of me in the kitchen.

Thirty years ago, in another era, on another planet, girlfriend went off to work with me stating I would prepare that evening's dinner for the two of us. During the day, I consulted a few cookbooks to get some ideas. I settled on something not too fancy, pork chops, vegetables, potato, etc. but my introductory plate was to be a "cute salad." The "cute" part, as per the picture in the cookbook, was a hard-boiled egg in the middle of the plate surrounded by lettuce and such however, the egg was dressed up as a little figure: pepper seeds for eyes, the end of a tomato as a hat, a piece of carrot for the mouth, and something, toothpicks I think, for the arms. First on the agenda: hard boil the eggs. I decided to use what was then a relatively new addition to the kitchen, the microwave. Ah ha I hear you chuckle but yours truly wasn't a complete dunderhead; I had read the news stories of how you had to poke a hole in the shell to allow the pent up pressure to escape so as to avoid the egg exploding. I used a pin to create my relief value and got the microwave going. I went about doing other things.

At about the two minute and ten second mark, I heard, "Bang!" I opened the door of the microwave to discover that although an egg is relatively small, it does possess sufficient material to completely coat the inside of a microwave oven. This was where I slapped my forehead and exclaimed, "¡Ay caramba!" I got things cleaned up (Oh lord, what a mess!) then consulted a cookbook to discover that when you poke the egg, you must make sure you poke not just the shell but the yoke. It being self-contained, it can have pressure build up in it during the cooking process and can explode. Live and learn. Been there, blown up that.

Girlfriend came home from work that night to a beautifully set table with a "egg figure" smiling up at her from the place setting. She knew I didn't like cooking and knew I wasn't good at it, but she said she always appreciated my efforts. (She was a fabulous cook.) It turned out to be a delightful dinner and I had her chuckling away describing my run-in with the microwave oven and using hyperbole to further enhance the catastrophic description of my "egg-cellent" adventure. Who doesn't like to come home from work to a meal laid out and waiting? And I can use my incompetence to charm the panties off the object of my desire. Aren't we guys adorable when we're in over our heads?

2014-01-23

Site Map - William Quincy BelleFollow me on Twitter

Wednesday, 22 January 2014

Size Zero: What the heck?

Zero? As in nothing, zip, nada? Who makes this s**t up? I don't remember anybody asking me for my opinion. Was I out of the room when the vote was taken?

Like many people is today's culture, I have heard the mantra of body image, body shaming, thin is in, etcetera, etcetera. The other day, I read something where the author refers to Genevieve Morton as a plus size model. Who's she? Never heard of her. I google some pictures and my jaw drops. She's a plus size? You are kidding me. Then who's size zero? Some heroin chic waif who looks like a boy? I've never forgotten when Twiggy became famous as the ideal all women should strive for. Geesh, was this supposed to bring out the latent homosexuality in all us guys? Was I supposed to be interested in pubescent girls? Are you trying to turn me into a paedophile? Sorry, this man wants a woman.

I have heard many say we live in a beauty obsessed society. Maybe so, but just where did this ideal of beauty come from? Size zero? Get out of here! I found a web site Body Measurements which gives "Celebrity measurements, bra size, height, weight and breast implants". Okay, just who is size zero? (I have no idea of the accuracy of these numbers.)

Genevieve Morton
Dress size = 2
Height = 5’8″ (173 cm)
Weight = 125 pounds (57 kg)

Christina Hendricks
Dress size = 8
Height = 5’8″ (173 cm)
Weight = 154 lbs (70 kg)

Kate Upton
Dress size = 2
Height = 5’8″ (173 cm)
Weight = 125 pounds (57 kg)

Kim Kardashian
Dress size = 8
Height = 5’3″ (160cm)
Weight = 134.5 pounds (61 kg)

Jennifer Lawrence
Dress size = 6
Height = 5’8” (172 cm)
Weight = 137 lbs (62 kg)

Genevieve Morton is size 2 and somebody refers to her as a plus size? Geesh, what does that make Jennifer Lawrence at size 6, a blimp? I have to shake my head. Are we truly that beauty obsessed? Has somebody somewhere set size zero as some sort of unattainable goal not realising that beauty is not a single number but a range? Besides, beauty is far more than just the visible. Then again, I can say that until I'm blue in the face, but that doesn't mean the little gremlin of self-doubt isn't eating away at every woman's confidence. As I've said many a time, we live in a culture where messages are pounded into our heads twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week via television, magazines, movies, billboard advertisements, etc. and the subliminal memes are floating around in our consciousness. Beauty obsessed? Does a goldfish know it's living in a fishbowl?

I was laughing the other week when newspapers were writing about how Hillary Clinton looked: her hair and her wardrobe. What? Would they write such pabulum if the politician was a man? I doubt it. And as an interested reader of current events, I want to hear Hillary's take on the issues; I don't want an analysis of her hairstyle. Do the editors who dictate the front page headlines think that I'm an idiot? Do they think women are idiots? And now for the latest on the Middle-East peace process and how Hillary's hotness factor has gone up a notch thanks to Infallible Le Rouge Forever Fuchsia by L'Oréal Paris. Oh for cryin' out loud.

Confidence
Size zero? The percentage of people who would be that size must be the exception to the rule. So, who are the rest of the people? Who are measuring up to size two, three, or going up to ten, fourteen, sixteen or ever higher? Are these people sitting at home alone or are they living wonderful lives?

"Nothing makes a woman more beautiful than the belief that she is beautiful."
- Sophia Loren US (Italian-born) movie actress (1934 – )

I ran across the following article and this woman seems like an extraordinary personality.

xojane - Jan 9/2014
I'm Fat, Forty And Single And I'm Having No Problems Getting Laid All The Time By Christine Whelan
I should note that when I tell you I'm fat, I really mean it. I'm not just slightly chubby and complaining about those last 15 pounds. I'm rather short and weigh almost precisely 300 lbs. I wear size 28 clothing. Unless you think such things are mutually exclusive, I would describe myself as reasonably pretty, in a natural, low-maintenance, naughty librarian kind of way. I am fiercely intelligent, deeply hilarious, casually stylish, utterly unselfconscious and really, genuinely nice. I am also an absolute riot in the sack. And I've been getting laid like crazy.

You must read the entire article. Ms. Whelan sounds like an amazing woman. And she's size 28. 28!?! And we're here talking about size zero? Get serious! Zero is about as far from "real life" as you can get.

Final Word
Ladies, please throw out your magazines and stop letting some unknown fashionista dictate size zero as being an ideal goal. As a man, I don't want to hug skin and bones. As a man, I am attracted to confidence. And as a man, I am going to less concerned about what you've got and more concerned with how you use it. At night, all cats are grey. For every beautiful woman in the world, there's a guy tired of her. Pretty packages do indeed attract the eye, but it's the contents which keep somebody coming back.

Are you the most beautiful woman in the world? What's important is that you are most beautiful woman in your world.


References

Wikipedia: Size Zero
Size zero or 0 is a women's clothing size in the US catalog sizes system. Size 0 and 00 were invented due to the changing of clothing sizes over time (referred to as vanity sizing or size inflation), which has caused the adoption of lower numbers. Modern size 0 clothing, depending on brand and style, fits measurements of chest-stomach-hips from 30-22-32 inches (76-56-81 cm) to 33-25-35 inches (84-64-89 cm). Size 00 can be anywhere from 0.5 to 2 inches (1 to 5 cm) smaller than size 0. Size zero often refers to extremely thin individuals (especially women and adolescent girls), or trends associated with them.

my blog: Body Image: Being comfortable about yourself - July 19/2013
I do not believe that any one of us truly appreciates the effect society, media, and our peer groups have on us. When I say we are the sum total of our experiences, those include a myriad of outside influences. Whether it is friends or colleagues, TV or the Internet, news or entertainment, we are constantly bombarded by a slew of messages which influence how we think and how we behave.

About.Com: Women's Fashion
What Size Does She Wear? By Cynthia Nellis
Although many celebrities do wear small sizes, they are not all size 0. In fact, some of the hottest celebs wear a size 6, 8 and beyond. But keep in mind that not all size 4s are equal: some celebs are taller, others are shorter. So we've included heights to get a better indicator of how your faves stack up. Find out what size Kim Kardashian, Jennifer Lopez, even Adele wears.

2014-01-22

Site Map - William Quincy BelleFollow me on Twitter

Tuesday, 21 January 2014

Divorce: Ya gotta laugh (it beats sobbing uncontrollably)

Ah yes, divorce: the gift that keeps on giving. You may be screaming in pain, but at some moment or another, you have to stop and laugh. It is all quite absurd. When you think about it, at one point in time you were absolutely starry eyed of the future with this one person, and now you can't stand their guts. Quite odd, eh? How do we go from one end of the spectrum all the way to the other end? How does what was once so good become so bad? Another one of those great mysteries of life. When it's good; it's good. And when it's bad, well, you don't want to know.

"Ah yes, divorce…from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet."
-Robin Williams

"The difference between a divorce and a legal separation is that a legal separation gives a husband time to hide his money."
-Johnny Carson

"The only time my wife and I had a simultaneous orgasm was when the judge signed the divorce papers."
-Woody Allen

"I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house."
-Zsa Zsa Gabor

"To get over my divorce, I got a prescription to live at the Playboy mansion for a while."
-James Caan

"I'd marry again if I found a man who had $15 million and would sign over half of it to me before the marriage and guarantee he'd be dead in a year."
-Bette Davis

"She cried -and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook."
-Tommy Manville

"I can't get divorced because I'm a Catholic. Catholics don't get divorced. They stay together through anger and hatred and festering misery, just like God intended."
-Lenny Clarke

"I look a divorce this way: it's better to have loved and lost, then to live with that bitch for the rest of my life."
-Steve McGrew

"Marriage isn't all that it's cracked up to be. Let me tell you, honestly. Marriage is probably the chief cause of divorce."
-Larry Gelbart

"Divorce sucks. Let me tell you, after five years of marriage, it is devastating to have the person with the good credit move out."
-Rich Vos

"Workaholicism is such a tough addiction to get over. I had to divorce my wife because she was an enabler."
-Dave Mordal

"What happened? Satan was busy?"
-Sam Kinison on finding out his wife had hired lawyer Marvin Mitchelson to represent her in her divorce case against him.

"I can't take his genius any more."
-Rita Hayworth on why she divorced Orson Welles

Some other bits of amusement:

my blog: Funny quotes about marriage (and divorce)

my blog: The Geography of a Woman

my blog: Relationships: Will we ever get it right?

my blog: Divorce: Why I'm Better Off Dead

2014-01-21

Site Map - William Quincy BelleFollow me on Twitter

Monday, 20 January 2014

Divorce: What's the other side of the story?

Years ago, a couple I knew got into difficulty after four years of marriage. The guy, a buddy from high school, talked to me several times and gave me his side of the story. It sounded bad. It sounded unfair. How could she be like that? Out of the blue, I had a chance to hear her side of the story and discovered a completely different aspect to the marital discord. Had my friend been lying to me? Had he been twisting the facts in his favour? Was he so buried in the trenches, he could no longer objectively see the big picture including his partner's view of the world?

I have jokingly referred to this incident over the years when I say that if anybody tells me they are getting a divorce, I am going to head for the hills and I'm not coming back until the divorce papers have been signed for at least five years. It is a tumultuous process. I would label it as one of, if not the most momentous event of anybody's life. However, stats are stats and my own divorce lawyer told me that in his experience, 90% of all divorces end in mutual agreement. In other words, he would qualify only 10% of his divorces as being confrontational and hence, difficult. I don't think he explained if mutual agreement meant the two parties continued to talk to each other or not ("I've gotten over my divorce and have forgiven the bastard/bitch."), but he himself was divorced and once told me he and his ex-wife were flying to New York together for the weekend to visit their daughter. That seems not just civilised but amicable.

In the past three years of blogging, I have read a number of personal stories about divorce. For the most part, these stories have been penned by women. For the most part, these stories give me their side of the story. I never hear what's happening on the other side of the marital divide. In my blog: "Two-thirds of divorces are filed by women", Willard F. Harley, Jr., Ph.D., clinical psychologist and marriage counsellor, points out that while there are many of the reasons for divorce such as physical abuse, infidelity, alcoholism, or criminal behaviour, the number one reason for a woman filing for divorce is neglect. Neglect? As I asked elsewhere, if at one time the guy was starry eyed about his wife, why is he now bored with her?

What's the other side of the story?

I have heard about the financial struggles when a spouse doesn't support their ex-partner. I have heard about the narcissistic behaviour of the ex-spouse. I have heard about the confrontations with the ex-spouse about co-parenting. What's the other side of the story?

Divorce: your spouse has lost his (or her) mind
Not every person is the same. Not every couple is the same. Not every divorce is the same. Nevertheless for me there seems to a common thread to many if not all of the stories. You don't really know what's going on in the mind of your spouse.

In the 2010 book "This Is Not The Story You Think It Is: A Season of Unlikely Happiness", author Laura Munson (my blog: Laura Munson: Save a marriage by doing nothing) recounts how her husband announced one day that he no longer loved her. Her response was that she didn't buy it. The truth seems to be that her husband was suffering a major personal life crisis brought on by a career failure, an excess of debt, and the fear of losing their farm. She let him work things out and after four months, he came back a renewed man. And a little contrite apparently.

Some of the comments to a newspaper article about the book condemned Ms. Munson by saying she was a doormat and she should have booted him out from the beginning. Obviously if Ms. Munson had followed their counsel she would now be divorced and she wouldn't have a book. Nevertheless she fortunately took another approach based on a more correct assessment of the situation and her bet paid off.

The question here is whether anybody truly knows what's going on in the head of the other person. If a marriage heads south, what's the reason? The real reason?

my blog: Why did that @#$%^* bastard divorce me?
I can't help thinking that there is more to this story than he's a @#$%^* douchebag. I'm certain that there are some truly bad people out there. Adolf Hitler was a bad man. John Wayne Gacy, the American serial killer who raped and murdered 33 teenage boys, was a bad man. I just find it hard to believe that every single @#$%^* bastard one day decides to leave his wife and children, ruin his reputation, besmirch his good name, alienate his kids and turn himself into a "bad man" just because he's a douchebag. He actually wants to be bad man as opposed to being loved and admired? Really?

I would now refer back to Gary Neuman's 2008 book "The Truth About Cheating: Why Men Stray and What You Can Do To Prevent It" in which the author states that 92% of the men he surveyed said their cheating is not just about sex, 88% said the other woman wasn't better looking or in better shape and 48% said cheating was about an emotional disconnection from their wives. What? Just what the heck is really going on? Does anybody really know? After all, if you have no idea what the problem is how do you fix anything?

People seemingly go bats**t crazy and or become belligerent because they feel trapped. They see no way to escape. It doesn't matter whether this is true or false in your eyes, in their eyes it just feels that way. Obviously not every marriage can be saved but it's certain that if you can't identify it, you ain't gunna fix it.

my blog: Michele Weiner-Davis: The Divorce Buster
Her conclusion is that a sense of hopelessness about the marriage leads people to part ways. She points out that we are not born with the knowledge of how to be a partner in marriage and why would we hesitate to acquire such knowledge if it would better our chances of remaining together. Learning communication skills and better understanding your partner can represent a plan of action or a new path to follow in the future which can give hope to a hopeless situation.

Final Word
Then again, at the end of the day, does it matter what the other side of the story is? You hurt. Your spouse wants to leave or has left. You hurt. Now you've gone from being part of a couple to being on your own and having to do everything, earn a living, run a home, and possibly parent children, all by yourself. Did I mention you hurt?

Nevertheless, I am always going wonder what the other side of the story is. Most of the stories I've read have been written by women. It's the woman's perspective on divorce. It's her take on her own divorce. What's the other side of the story? Of course, after all is said and done, we all have to "deal with it." There is no choice; we all have to move on. Nevertheless, I still remain curious as to what the other side would have to say about it all. Would knowing that have prevented the divorce? Would knowing that have helped both sides in working out the issues? Maybe yes; maybe no. I still wonder what the other side of the story is.

2014-01-20

Site Map - William Quincy BelleFollow me on Twitter