Friday 16 August 2013

Why don't you go f**k yourself?

I'm riding the subway and the train pulls up to a station. The doors open and I can hear the movement of people getting on and off. Behind me, a woman's voice says loudly, "Ow! That was my foot!" Then I hear the voice of a man outside of the train say, "If you didn't stick your foot out, that wouldn't happen. There's an easy answer for you."

I never did turn around to look. I sat there shaking my head as I mulled over what had just taken place behind me. Do people want to be confrontational? If I had been that man, my first reaction, I mean my very first reaction, would have been to apologise. My instinctive reaction is to be deferential. Did my parents raise me correctly to be polite and respectful? Or is that because I'm not a true blue alpha dog? (see my blog: Beta Male. Beta what?)

The other day, I'm standing at the corner waiting to cross. The light turns green and immediately several pedestrians launch themselves into the crosswalk. A car at the corner, wanting to turn right, starts its turn then has to stop and wait for the crosswalk to clear. Not the car directly behind the first one, but the second one back immediately lays on the horn. I don't mean a short beep but really laying into it with a steady scream of what I interpret as impatience. Okay, what do you want the guy at the corner to do? Run over the pedestrians?

Is it just me or are people on the attack? The slightest inconvenience is a green light to get angry. There is no give somebody a break. There is no recognition that they themselves could be inconveniencing somebody else. No, it's me, me, me. I jokily refer to this self-centeredness with the greeting, "Hi! How am I?"

I'm waiting to cross the street as a couple of cars are coming up. The first one slows down and hesitates; I'm guessing to check the street signs. At the last minute the car turns. The second car immediately gives a blast on the horn. I notice the turning car didn't have on a turn signal. Did the guy forget in his hurry? Whatever the case, the second car was inconvenienced how? Taking his foot off the gas? I didn't notice him being substantially slowed down or anything. Nevertheless, the second car did feel this warranted an angry blast on the horn.

Geesh, give me a break. I hardly ever use the horn. I use it so infrequently, I forget it's there. I drive in a more easy going defensive fashion. I'm not out to take offense at the slightest inconvenience from somebody else. Why bother? Heck, I make mistakes.

Years ago, I'm driving up a street and am watching what's happening in front of me. Car #1 decides to parallel park. It stops, puts on its blinker, then starts backing up. Car #2, not seeing this because they were distracted, comes up just about bumper to bumper with car #1 the lays on the horn. Now the problem is that car #1 can't back up and of course, car #2 can't move forward. Car #1 wants to park. Car #2 won't move, just keeps honking. Car #2 can't move forward.

After a moment, I pull out and pass both car #2 and car #1. As I continue up the street, I keep looking in my rear view mirror to see that car #1 and car #2 are still in a stalemate. I get to the top of the street and turn taking a last look at the two cars battling out for who's going to move. Ridiculous.

I'm not going to get mad. I'm not going to honk. I'm going to drive defensively and be prepared to go around people or find another route. There is no point in arguing. My goal is not to win the battle but to get to where I want to go. I still claim that randomly honking your horn may allow you to express your frustration but in no way impresses upon the target of your frustration your particular opinion. Blasting your horn just contributes to the cacophony of the street and the other person is wrapped up in their own automotive cocoon and more than likely never heard your honk at all. Other than disturb the pedestrians in the street, honking probably achieves nothing at all.

Stay calm and carry on.

I'm in a mall on an upper level looking down at the crowd of shoppers. One person, rushing to go somewhere, accidentally bumps in another shopper. The second shopper drops a bag the stands there watching the first person rush off. I couldn't hear the voice of the person but from reading their lips, they clearly said, "F**k you."

Yes indeed. Why don't you go f... Oops. I'm already gone.

Of Related Interest

my blog: Your an idiot - Aug 10/2010
Anybody who publishes on the Internet has to be prepared to be criticized. You write something while crafting your prose to best explain your point of view to the world and then the world comes and gives you thumbs up or thumbs down. Sometimes, the world uses another digit.

my blog: Porcine Fornicator - Dec 3/2010
I was negotiating my way through the numerous pedestrians when I noticed a small man coming towards me... We got closer to the point where we were going to pass one another on the sidewalk. I was looking down right at his face watching his lips move when all of a sudden, he looked up and our eyes locked. It was just a fraction of a second but for the briefest of moments, we were staring at one another and each of us knew the other was looking back. In a distinct voice, loud enough that I could easily understand what he was articulating, he said to me the words, "Pig f**ker."


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