Saturday 31 May 2014

Elliot Rodger and Toxic Masculinity

I’ve read the news reports. I’ve seen the video. I’ve gone over the details of what happened and I’ve found further articles describing the life and times of this young man. I’ve perused the so-called manifesto. I am disturbed. I am frightened. I am perplexed. The hatred, the distorted view of reality, and the misinterpretation of the facts stuns me beyond belief. This man’s rage was so deep, so extensive, I feel apprehensive and out of sorts even though I am far away on the other side of the continent with no personal ties to anybody involved in this story.

We are all going to analyse the protagonist, dissect his life, and attempt to uncover all the telltale signs of the impending disaster. Will any of this matter? Will any of this make it any easier to detect and stop the next incident? Out of the seven billion plus people on the planet, things fall through the cracks. Bad happens. Bad is unavoidable. Statistically speaking, the collective we is doing all right. Or is it?

An iceberg supposedly shows 10% of itself out of water. The remaining 90% is hidden. If Elliot’s misogynistic rant against the world is the current headline, what else is going on in the world I am unaware of? The Twitter hashtag #YesAllWomen (Washington Post) has produced an outpouring of stories about an inexplicable and shameful attitude of some men towards women. I say some men because #NotAllMen are like Elliot. We are the fathers, step-fathers, grandfathers, and uncles plus the husbands, boyfriends, and lovers including friends, colleagues, acquaintances and total strangers who look upon women with appreciation, admiration, and most of all respect. How could any man hate a woman just, so it seems, for being a woman? Where did this hatred of women come from?

The following article is a must read. I wish I had written it myself. The author Harris O’Malley has captured exactly what’s wrong with the male animal who subscribes to a patriarchal politic of entitlement. If ever there was a demonstrable example of the objectification of women, this is it. It is sickening.

Please read this entire article now.

Paging Dr. Nerdlove - May 26/2014
Elliot Rodger and the Price of Toxic Masculinity by Dr. Nerdlove
This is the message we’re sold over and over again: A woman who is a virgin is a prize beyond rubies, holding her “special gift” for a “special person”. A male (not a man, a male) is a failure. He is a boy, not a man. He is a failure, despite being wealthy, despite being privileged (in every sense of the word) because masculinity is rated on two axes – in our capacity for sex and our capacity for violence.
...
Elliot Rodger wanted to prove he was “alpha”, to prove his manhood. He couldn’t fuck his way to manliness, so he decided to prove it by murdering people.

The Pick-up Artist
I vaguely remember hearing this term, PUA, years ago but recently had my eyes opened to this sub-culture of the MRA, Men’s Rights Activism or MRM Men’s Rights Movement. The objective is to have sex with a woman. Yes, that’s it. In God’s plan, the grand scheme of things, the entire purpose of the male animal is to copulate with the female. It is our raison d’ĂȘtre. The sum total of our existence is how many times with how many women we can insert our penis and ejaculate. There is no fatherhood, creativity, higher learning, morality, belief, or wonder about the world, science, philosophy, music, etc.; there is merely this single primordial destiny of copulation. And as a consequence, the rules of the game are that the PUA can lie, cheat, and steal in order to win. He can trick a woman, fool her, and do anything he could possibly think of as long as at the end of it all he succeeds in having sex. Women are not people; they are sexual objects. They are things. Women are not to be loved, cherished, and respected; they are to be used and discarded when one is finished with them.

Wait. What?

What was the point of me going to university? What was the point of reading a thousand plus books? What was the point of bettering myself, studying music, taking some French, travelling, keeping up with current events and even spending time learning about all things sexual including female sexuality so I could hopefully be a better more satisfying partner? What’s the point if life is really about the three F’s : Find’em; fuck’em; and forget’em?

Is this where I break into my best Peggy Lee imitation, “Is that all there is?”

I am sitting here with my mouth open. This is truly jaw-droppingly crazy. The definition of a man is not who he is, it’s the sex he has. Don’t get me wrong, sex is important in life but I like to think when I come to the table, I am more than that. My being, my ego, my manhood is more extensive, more complicated than something as simple as the sex I have. Am I prepared to die over sex? Am I prepared to kill over sex?


Lacie Green - May 26/2014
Elliot Rodger: More than a madman
Elliot's actions are a part of a broader pattern...and not enough people are talking about it.



What the f**k is going on?

The Guardian- May 31/2014
Fifth arrest over gang-rape and murder of two cousins in India by Kevin Rawlinson
Two girls aged 14 and 15, were raped, killed and hanged from a mango tree in a small village in the state of Uttar Pradesh.

There have been protests against the perceived police inaction and two officers have been arrested, with two more having been fired for failing to investigate when the father of one of the murdered girls reported them missing. But in a country with a long history of tolerance for sexual violence, the Uttar Pradesh state's top official mocked journalists for asking about the attack. "Aren't you safe? You're not facing any danger, are you? Then why are you worried? What's it to you?" the state's chief minister, Akhilesh Yadav, said.

Paging Dr. Nerdlove - Apr 28/2014
Understanding The Dangers of Dating
On April 25th, Chris Plaskon, a junior at Jonathan Law High-School in Milford Connecticut, asked Meran Sanchez to go to the prom with him. She turned him down.

So he grabbed her by the throat, pushed her down a flight of stairs and then stabbed her repeatedly in the face, chest and throat. By 7:43 that morning, she was pronounced dead at the hospital. Because she didn’t want to go to the prom with somebody who was by all accounts a popular and well-liked student at her high-school.


But it’s even more subtle than that

NBC News - May 30/2014
Altered Yearbook Photos at Utah High School Spark Controversy By Elisha Fieldstadt
A Utah high school's decision to airbrush yearbook photos of girls who were “in violation of the dress code" has students, parents and rape-recovery advocates dismayed. The photos of at least seven girls in Wasatch High School's yearbook were altered without notice to add sleeves to tank tops, raise necklines and in one case, cover up a student’s tattoo. No portraits of male students were doctored, The Associated Press reported.

Toronto Sun - May 29/2014
Teen girls sent home from Labrador high school for visible bra straps by Sheena Goodyear
Dozens of teen girls were sent home from school in Labrador City, N.L., for violating the school's dress code...for having visible bra straps... Maddie Pynn, 16, was wearing a summer dress and alleges she was told "if one gust of wind came you'd see everything underneath." Pynn said teachers have told her the dress code exists because teenage boys are easily distracted by girls' bodies.

"A shoulder shouldn't make anyone uncomfortable, and if it does, you're the problem," she said, adding the school is "teaching us how not to be distracting" instead of "teaching boys to have more respect towards women."

"I was talking to a few boys and they even said they are offended because the school is making them out to be uncontrolled horny monsters," Pynn said.

my blog: No leggings, girls. You’re driving us boys wild. - May 15/2014
Haven Middle School in Evanston, Illinois school published a dress code as of March 26, 2014 which reads in part: "If leggings are worn the shirt, sweater, or skirt must be a minimum of fingertip length of a straight arm extend on the leg." (copied on May 10, 2014)

Email from parent to principal: "We are frankly shocked at this antiquated and warped message that is being sent to the kids. Under no circumstances should girls be told that their clothing is responsible for boy's bad behaviors. This kind of message lands itself squarely on a continuum that blames girls and women for assault by men. It also sends the message to boys that their behaviours are excusable, or understandable given what the girls are wearing. And if the sight of a girl's leg is too much for boys at Haven to handle, then your school has a much bigger problem to deal with."

my blog: Boys Will Be Boys (or However We Make Them) - Jan 9/2014
In 2014, documentary film maker Jennifer Siebel Newsom is going to release the film "The Mask You Live In" which asks the question "As a society, how are we failing our boys?" She makes the following points.

Compared to a girl the same age, a boy in late adolescence is 7 times more likely to die by his own hand.

Boys under 17 drink more heavily than any other population group.

Boy in the U.S. are 30% more likely than girls to flunk or drop-out of school.

Where is this s**t coming from?
Boys are less aggressive when raised by a lesbian couple: As reported by the University of Southern California, a study of children raised by gay parents showed differences in their behaviour from those raised by heterosexual parents. For example, boys raised by lesbians appear to be less aggressive and more nurturing than boys raised in heterosexual families. While the aggressiveness of males may be attributed in part to the genes of the species, is aggressiveness also a learned behaviour? A study showing that lesbian parents have less aggressive boys would seem to point out that if Junior's a tough guy, he may have gotten that way from imitating dear old Dad.

Hatred: Hatred of women, of men, of blacks, of whites, of any colour of skin, of Jews, Muslims or Christians, of any belief, of gays, of LGTBQ, etc. is taught. There is nothing, absolutely nothing innate to the human gene which determines hatred for another group of people.

Final Word
Final word? I’m going to give a final word on all this? *facepalm* Gee-sus H. K. Rist. What a glorious cluster f**k-up royale. I stand back and look at all this and see that we, yes we as in the collective we, are one hundred percent responsible for the mess we’re in but either don’t realise it, refuse to admit it, or look away out of the naive hope it will all go away and as a consequence, are actually perpetuating the problem. We teach girls how to avoid getting raped but we don’t teach boys not to rape. We avoid sex education sometimes even banning it then wonder why the sexual state of the world is - if you’ll forgive the pun - so f**ked up. My God, we are so cruel to one another. Yes, there is a great deal of human kindness in the world, generosity and sharing, but every once in a while a dramatic even such as Elliot Rodger comes along to remind us that there remains so much to do. And the more subtle messages such as altering Facebook photos, sending girls home for violating dress codes, etc. are perpetuating a culture we seem to know is wrong but are incapable of changing on an individual basis since so many are doing absolutely nothing about the status quo.

A long time ago, somebody pointed out to me that humanity has improved very little in the past two thousand years. Yes, we have cable TV; yes, we have mobile devices connected to the Internet, but overall we remain an undisciplined bunch of selfish individuals who philosophically and morally leave a lot to be desired. We know so little but don’t even know it.


References

Wikipedia: 2014 Isla Vista killings
On May 23, 2014, a killing spree occurred in Isla Vista, California, United States, starting with a stabbing attack at an apartment, and continuing with a series of drive-by shootings and vehicular attacks near the campus of University of California, Santa Barbara. Twenty-two-year-old Elliot Rodger killed seven people, including himself, and wounded thirteen others.

TIME - May 30/2014
India’s Rapes Too Often Excused as ‘Boys Will Be Boys’ by Mallika Dutt
Let’s stop saying that half the human race is inherently aggressive, predatory and incapable of transformation.


my blog: Steubenville Rape Case: It could be your daughter. - Jan 13/2013
The media is filled with the back and forth debating of whether the boys are guilty or not. ... The bigger issue is what's going on in our society. This type of situation has cropped up so many times that anybody who stands back and looks at the big picture has to ask themselves whether or not we fully grasp what's going on in society. You go to a party and see a girl who has made the mistake of drinking too much. What do you do? Try to help her out by sobering her up. See if she has a purse and try to find the telephone number of her parents and call them. Pull off her panties and insert your fingers in her vagina.

my blog: How to avoid sexual assault: Don't dress like a whore - Aug 30/2012
Krista Ford is the niece of Rob Ford, the current major of Toronto, Canada's largest city. ... Around 6pm on Wednesday, August 29, 2012, Ms. Ford tweeted some advice on how to avoid sexual assault: "Stay alert, walk tall, carry mace, take self-defence classes & don’t dress like a whore. #DontBeAVictim #StreetSmart"

2015-05-31

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Wednesday 21 May 2014

Yes, Rob Ford can be fired and so can you.

When I tweeted a previous post, “If Rob Ford was an employee, he would be fired” (May 11/2014), somebody wrote back,

Firing someone for substance abuse would be violating human rights. It would depend on the company policy and employment contract.

You wrote he would be terminated with cause because of his substance abuse? That is a direct violation of human rights law.

This person then pointed me here

Ontario Human Rights Commission
Drug or alcohol dependency and abuse as a disability

This person is right. If you were an alcoholic or you were a drug addict, you could not be terminated for having an addiction. An addiction is considered a form of disability. Also, if you previously had a problem but are currently sober, you are protected.

However, this person missed the point of my article.

Throughout the television series The West Wing, the staffers are heard to say to President Bartlet, “I serve at the pleasure of the president.” The person mentioned above, you, and even I serve at the pleasure of the president. Any one of us could be dismissed at any time. The company is under no obligation to retain our services.

However, the law protects us as individuals from frivolous dismissals: no racism, sexism, or discrimination of any kind including I don’t like the way you knot your tie. Nevertheless, a company can decide to get rid of any one of us if it follows the law which means a company can kick us out the door if it sufficiently compensates us. Such compensation is usually one year’s salary. Of course, an employee can take it to court, but he or she may have an uphill battle and is it going to be worth it?

Where did I get this?

I sat down and talked one on one with an acquaintance, the head of human resources. We talked in general terms about the real world then specifically about Rob Ford. Ford has violated so many company policies; he would have been kicked to the curb a long, long time ago. In fact, his whole history is so questionable; the company never would have hired him in the first place. This isn’t about alcoholism or drug addiction; this is about behaviour.

Being an alcoholic and not admitting it and not seeking help: you’re out.

Being a drug addict and not admitting it and not seeking help: you’re out.

Absenteeism: you’re out.

Blatant sex talk towards a female colleague = sexual harassment: you’re out.

Having alcohol and or drugs at work: you’re out.

Drunk in public, urinating in public, racist rants in public: you’re out.

Outrageous behaviour which could negatively impact the image of the company: you’re out.

There are so many witnesses to the above issues, it’s ridiculous. I haven’t even touched upon his texting while driving, driving while inebriated or stoned or both, the on-going investigation into his involvement in drugs, and the new conflict of interest allegation. I will be so interested when the documentation is released to the public as to why Ford was dropped as football coach at Don Bosco Catholic Secondary School.

As I said above, if the company gives a compensation package to the employee which matches the letter of the law, the employee has nothing to sue for, nothing to go to court for. A company would thoroughly document the transgressions of the employee and be able to prove the employee had not just violated policies, but failed to live up to his end of the bargain, that is, the satisfactory execution of their job.

The H.R. person added, “Rob Ford is a brutish lout.”

This isn’t about Rob Ford having a substance abuse problem. This is about his on-going bad behaviour. This isn’t about his private life as what he’s done and what he’s doing is very much public. Rob Ford hasn’t crossed just the line; he’s crossed the line, drawn a new line, and then crossed it.

Can you fire a mayor?
Good question. Several American comedians brought up this idea but it would seem that unlike a company, the city of Toronto has an election process, not quite the same as the hiring of an employee. It never envisaged finding itself being led by an emotionally unstable personality having a full-blown meltdown.

Alcoholic Thinking
In my December 9, 2014 posting “Rob Ford: Alcoholic Thinking and a Gullible Public”, I put forward the premise that bad thinking, rationalisation, a distorted view of reality, arrogance, egotism, etc. can persist even when a person is sober. It can persist for months, sometimes years after a person becomes sober. Rob Ford’s bombastic style, his self-absorption, his one-sided view of the issues are all indicative of a person who suffers from an addictive personality and how this man made it this far will be a topic of discussion for political analysts for years to come.

A Distorted View of Reality: $1.1 Billion
Ontario has been going just ape-s**t over the Liberal fiasco of cancelling two gas plants in order to gain votes. That cancellation has now ended up costing the taxpayers $1.1 billion.

Am I the only one who sees the similarity with Rob Ford?

Robby is running around trying to rationalize his year of stupidity by telling us how he’s saved Toronto a billion dollars. I’ve had my issues but I’m doing a good job for the hard-working people of the city.

Rob cancels the Scarborough LRT. That cancellation will cost at least $100 million but will probably be higher.

Rob votes for a subway line and that will now cost the Toronto taxpayers an extra one billion dollars.

Total cost? $1.1 billion. What a coinkydink. Now Ontarians can talk about the Liberal’s Gas Plant Fiasco and Ford’s Public Transit Fiasco.

Final Word
I think Rob Ford and his whole family may be mentally unbalanced. I wish them all the best in sorting out their lives.

But more importantly, I think Rob Ford is a lousy mayor. He never should have been elected in the first place. He being in office is the folly of the electorate. Stop the gravy train? Please, stop the insanity.

I will keep saying this until I am blue in the face. The fickle voter wants quick fixes and falls victim to the next snake oil salesman. Please, I beg of you, remember this: “If it was that easy, it would be done by now.” Rob Ford is full of s**t. He gets himself elected on a platform of all those before him were crooks, cheaters, and bad spenders of the taxpayers’ money then he turns around and railroads the collective we in a direction of ill-informed decisions lacking in true leadership. He has a poor grasp of the big picture and the long-term benefit of the city and is instead pandering to the dissatisfaction of a public who think all politicians are evil.

I remind everyone of Ford’s campaign. He publishes a video of him looking at the so-called perks of the city council by holding up the free subway passes they all get. That totals $70,000 per year. Stop the gravy train.

Hel-lo! Rob Ford has cost us as much money as the Gas Plant Fiasco. Free subway passes? Are you s**ttin’ me? Ford returns calls from constituents about getting potholes repaired? He just cost you one point one billion dollars. Never mind Ford, are you, yes you, crazy?

Trying to sort out fact from fiction is difficult. Trying to stop listening to the repeated mantra of I’m right and everybody else is wrong is nearly impossible. Toronto is being bamboozled by a brutish lout. We elected him and we are going to be paying for it for years to come. If we re-elect him in October, we are far more stupid than he is. Unfortunately, by the time we figure that out, the next guy is going to be laying the blame on his predecessors and we’ll be swallowing that line of B.S. hook, line, and sinker. If it was that easy, it would be done by now.


References

Toronto Star - Nov 28/2013
Toronto Mayor Rob Ford’s $100-million boondoggle: Editorial
Ford is quick to attack McGuinty for the gas plant scandal. Fair enough. We too have criticized the former premier, in this space, for that fiasco. But Ford is guilty of the same wasteful offence.

He flushed away $100 million of taxpayers’ money to please Scarborough residents expecting delivery on a reckless “subways, subways, subways” promise. That’s $100 million in sunk costs gone to buy — nothing.

The drain on taxpayers doesn’t end there. Far from it. The actual bill for Ford’s three-stop Scarborough subway extension amounts to more than $3 billion . The province is carrying most of that burden, with Ottawa kicking in $660 million, but it still leaves Toronto in need of almost $1 billion.

my blog: Rob Ford: Alcoholic Thinking and a Gullible Public - Dec 9/2013 (Updated)
I'm not going to talk about drugs and I'm not going to talk about the comedic fodder for late night talk shows. I am, however, going to talk about the hyperbolic bravado of political leaders vying for my vote who are counting on me being naive and uninformed.

Published on May 1, 2014 by The National
Rex Murphy: Toronto Mayor Rob Ford (3:11)
Point of View: Rex Murphy's take on the new Rob Ford revelations.


2014-05-21

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Sunday 18 May 2014

Ze Frank: True Facts About The Octopus



Published on Apr 1, 2014 by zefrank1


References

Wikipedia: Ze Frank
Ze Frank (born Hosea Jan Frank on March 31, 1972) is an American online performance artist, composer, humorist and public speaker based in Los Angeles, California. He was a pioneer of the vlogging format and is considered one of the most influential people in the field, inspiring such shows as the vlogbrothers, Philip DeFranco and Wheezy Waiter. He is currently executive vice president of video at BuzzFeed.

official web site: Ze Frank

YouTube channel: Ze Frank

Twitter: @Ze_Frank

TED Talks: Ze Frank
Ever since his "How to Dance Properly" viral video -- born as a party invite for 17 friends -- hit the Web in 2001, Ze Frank has been making people giggle, guffaw and gasp out loud whilst procrastinating at work. He defines, in many ways, the genre of online comedy, and continues to innovate madly on the form.

Postscript
It seems Ze Frank has produced a series of videos entitled "True Facts About" various animals and such. I have watched several of them and they are quite funny, at times laughing out loud funny.

True Facts About The Mantis

True Facts About The Angler Fish

True Facts About Dung Beetles

2014-05-18

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Saturday 17 May 2014

Kristen Quintrall: He Always Cums First



This is for all my ladies out there...you know what I'm talking about...

Skinny jeans that hug that D
Patchy beard oooo it tickles me
Ironic T's from the Goodwill Store
And the way you say, You've probably never heard this band before..."
He's a trader joe's bagger and a champion Quilter
And his whole hipster life is an Instagram Filter
I love you, hipster man
I love your hipster brand
I love you, hipster man
There's only one thing I can't stand

He always cums first
He's needs release before it's cool
But there's nothing left for me but this vibrating tool
Oooooo ah ah
Hipster men cum first (before it's cool)
Oooooo ah ah
Hipster men cum first
Hipster men cum first
Ya he always fucking cum first

Spinning vinyl sends my heart a flutter
Vegan diet means vegan nut butter
Grocery shopping on his Beach Cruiser
American Spirits, ya he's a tobacco user
Loves his coffee, dubstep and photography dream
It's not my fault that I'm not into "mainstream cream" (Jizz)
I love you, hipster man
I love your hipster brand
I love you, hipster man
There's only one thing I can't stand

He always cums first
He's needs release before it's cool
But there's nothing left for me but this vibrating tool (that always work, doesn't it)
And I need release, (oh big time)
And ya, I need it quick
Because there's no kind of app that replaces meatstick (I mean penis)
Oooooo ah ah
Hipster men cum first (every single time)
Oooooo ah ah
Hipster men cum first
Hipster men cum first
And I'm about to burst

My mind is going crazy , he's got so much swagger
Wrote the RSS feed on the underground chatter
He's always at the shows down in Silverlake
Would never make a video of the Harlem Shake.
Watches Buffy every night after Art School
Cuz he loved Vampires before they were cool
He's my dirty little hipster, I can't resist this fella
If he breaks my heart, than I'll find another at Coachella ella ella ay ay ay


References

Published on Apr 2, 2013 by Kristen Quintrall
This is the first song I've ever written and recorded. Sometimes you think you have a genius idea so you send it out into the internet world. Sometimes you're right...sometimes you are terribly wrong. Either way, I'm laughing.

IMDb: Kristen Quintrall
Born and raised in Germany to a military family, Kristen Quintrall attended Flordia State University's film school. Not content to learn just one aspect, Kristen focused her efforts on acting, writing, editing and directing. Upon graduation, she packed her things and moved to Los Angeles. Her first professional job was the head of editorial for Channel Records (a division of Interscope) creating music videos and web based promotional content. Her move into narrative film came in 2006 when she set up shop at indie studio The Asylum. At the Asylum she edited six feature films and stepped in front of the camera with starring roles in their films The Apocalypse, Transmorphers, and Universal Soldiers. The Asylum led her to work directly for comic mastermind Jerry Zucker as his personal editor. From there she moved to Sam Raimi's Ghost House pictures cutting web based versions of films like The Grudge 2. In early 2008 she moved to Lafayette, Louisiana to bring her unique creative vision, management skills, and technical prowess to Sweet Post Productions where she serves as the chief editor for their multi-picture, yearly slate. When she's not busy cutting features for international distribution, Kristen lends her sizable talents to the production world as both a producer and actress.

Wikipedia (in French): Filmographie
* Supercroc : Lt.Henche (2007)
* The Apocalypse : Lindsay (2007)
* Transmorphers : Ursa (2007)
* Invasion of the pod people : Alyssa (2007)
* Universal Soldiers : Pfc.Kate Riley (2007)
* Chrome Angels : K.J. (2009)
* Wolvesbayne : Vapirella (2009)
* Gamerz187 : Ginger (2009)
* The Dunwich horror : Caitlin Bowers (2009)
* Quantum Apocalypse : Lindsey (2010)
* Somebody help me 2 : Receptioniste (2010)
* Asics Levitation : Designer (2011)
* Pimp Bullies : Candy (2011)
* Refuge from the Storm : Linda (2012)
* Adopting Terror : Nikki (2012)
* Battlefield America : Bang Squad Fan (2012)
* The Helpers : Claire (2012)
* The Whole Banana (2013)

official web site: Kristen Quintrall
I love to laugh, dance and make movies. I love wine and cheese fondue. I love my family...and I probably love you too.

Facebook: Kristen Quintrall
I love nothing better than making movies ;)

Twitter: KQ @kristenq
One time someone on YouTube called me SkankyMissSkankKank in the comments section. Another time I won the Showcase Showdown on the Price is Right.

YouTube channel: Kristen Quintrall
Some times you think you have a genius idea and it's super funny. You send it out into the internet world. Sometimes you're right...sometimes you are terribly wrong. Either way, I'm laughing ;)

2014-04-17

Site Map - William Quincy BelleFollow me on Twitter

Friday 16 May 2014

BuzzFeed: The Most Disturbing Teacher Confessions




Published on Jan 27, 2014 by BuzzFeedYellow
The Most Disturbing Teacher Confessions
Your "artwork" is terrible.


BuzzFeed - Mar 12/2014
19 Brutally Honest Teacher Confessions by Arielle Calderon

4. Sometimes I can't believe how stupid some of my students are.

16. My students are so bad this year that I've gone back to drinking again.

3. I'm a teacher and lots of my students flirt with me... My secret? I find it hard to resist.

12. I'm a college professor sleeping with a student. If anyone found out I could lose my job.

14. I'm a professor and I always wonder if any of my students think I'm attractive.

15. I'm a professor and I want to know why my female students aren't making passes at me.

17. I feel more loved by my students than I do my own family.


BuzzFeed - Mar 27/2014
18 Scandalous Confessions From Teaching Assistants by Rega Jha

2. I'm a TA. I hooked up with the professor I assist earlier this week. He's married and I have a boyfriend. I feel terrible, but at the same time I've never experienced anything so hot and intense.



References

Wikipedia: BuzzFeed
BuzzFeed is a website that combines a technology platform for detecting viral content with an editorial selection process to provide a snapshot of "the viral web in realtime". Co-founded in 2006 by Jonah Peretti (who is also cofounder of The Huffington Post), BuzzFeed is located in Manhattan, New York in the Flatiron District.

official web site: BuzzFeed

YouTube channel: BuzzFeedYellow

YouTube channel: BuzzFeedVideo

Despite my best efforts on Google, I couldn't find out the difference between BuzzFeedYellow and BuzzFeedVideo. Comedy versus serious? Original content versus other content? Beats me, but there they are. Enjoy.



2014-05-16

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Thursday 15 May 2014

No leggings, girls. You’re driving us boys wild.

Much ado about nothing? The world is once again in a panic because our culture is crumbling and anarchy is just around the corner. And the issue which sparked this horror? Leggings. Yes, you heard me. Parents, pundits, school principals, and I’m guessing perverts are all staring wide-eyed at teenage girls and, get this, teenage boys, who are sprucing up their 2014 wardrobe with the newest fashion trend reportedly having now surpassed denim jeans in popularity to become the “new pant”.

HuffPost Business - Apr 11/2014
Something Strange Is Happening To Teens' Pants by Kim Bhasin
America's teenagers are dropping their jeans and replacing them with elastic-waistband stretch pants, according to a well-regarded report on teenage buying habits.

Leggings (and yoga pants from Lululemon) were ranked the most popular trend among female teens this spring, according to a semi-annual study released this week by financial services firm Piper Jaffray. Nike was the No. 1 brand among teen boys.

Jeans were nowhere to be found on the list, after years of consistently ranking as a top 10 trend.

Teens now prefer "Athleisure" -- the horrendous industry term for workout gear that you can wear outside the gym -- over the skinny, butt-crack exposing, low-rise jeans that dominated the landscape for a seemingly interminable amount of years.


What does this mean move away from “skinny, butt-crack exposing, low-rise jeans” mean for American teenagers? Scrutiny, of course, and adults have already sprung into action.

Haven Middle School
This Evanston Illinois school published a dress code as of March 26, 2014 which reads in part: If leggings are worn the shirt, sweater, or skirt must be a minimum of fingertip length of a straight arm extend on the leg. (copied on May 10, 2014)

While this doesn’t seem to ban leggings, it does state that leggings must be covered up. They are not a replacement for pants. Let the counterarguments begin.

Evanston Patch - Mar 9/2014
Haven Middle School Bans Leggings & Yoga Pants -- Too Distracting For Boys by Christine Wolf
I think I’ve heard most arguments about leggings: They’re too distracting to the boys. Inappropriate. Unbecoming. They create a lustful atmosphere infecting society and are, in some countries, considered illegal.

The author, who is clearly against the ban on leggings, goes on to quote an email sent by a parent to the principal.

We are frankly shocked at this antiquated and warped message that is being sent to the kids. Under no circumstances should girls be told that their clothing is responsible for boy's bad behaviors. This kind of message lands itself squarely on a continuum that blames girls and women for assault by men. It also sends the message to boys that their behaviours are excusable, or understandable given what the girls are wearing. And if the sight of a girl's leg is too much for boys at Haven to handle, then your school has a much bigger problem to deal with.

Kenilworth Junior High School
This school in Petaluma, California took an even more direct approach.

KTVU - Apr 5/2014
Petaluma middle school bans 'too tight' pants for girls
At Kenilworth Junior High in Petaluma, a school administrator pulled all the girls aside Thursday afternoon and told them they couldn't wear pants that were "too tight" because it distracts the boys.

Surprisingly or not surprisingly, people did not take this lying down. Parents protested, especially parents with daughters. Women protested seeing this as a sexist view of the world.

Jezebel - Apr 9/2014
Middle School Bans Tight Pants Because They 'Distract the Boys' by Laura Beck
Middle school boys are "distracted by" (read: will get a boner over) literally anything. Whether a girl is wearing several garbage bags over a sumo wrestler costume or skinny jeans, little dudes are still gonna pop wood. It has NOTHING to do with what the girls are wearing, and everything to do with biology.
...
Girls are being punished for the most ridiculous of reasons — that a boy might be distracted by her feminine form. Deal with it, people. It's called life.
...
If you're fearful of boys getting a little nutty around ladies in yoga pants, perhaps you should talk to the student body about how to behave like decent human beings in all situations.

Keith Ablow
Meanwhile, back on the pro-ban side.

Media Matters - May 9/2014
Fox Host Claims Girls "Provoked" Harassment By Wearing Leggings To School by Olivia Marshall
Fox News' "Medical A-Team" member Dr. Keith Ablow claimed that girls can "certainly provoke" harassment by wearing leggings to school.

ABLOW: You cannot come in with leggings. Because my son wants to learn and the truth is it is distracting. And it is kind of inappropriate because when did we decide as a culture that tights would become an overgarment instead of an undergarment. The reason we're doing that is because girls are in a panic to be more and more sexual because we've taken all the restraint away from femininity. We've made girls into boys.
[...]
ABLOW: I don't know that we can restrain boys from being boys. So the long stare, the offhand comment, you have to -- what do you do, excuse it? Because it was certainly provoked. And I think girls put themselves in the line of fire that way.

My Opinion
Curiouser and Curiouser. I’ve read several other articles about this leggings issue. I have spoken with different people including mothers of tweens. The entire question seem to break down into several points.

1. Boys are horny (read: sexual predators).
That’s just the way life is. Yes, we would all like to swim with the dolphins but if there are sharks in the tank, you better damn well conduct yourself as though you’re going to get chomped on at any moment. Yes, sweetie, you can go out on a date with Johnny but I am going to teach you how to kick him in the balls and give him a faceful of pepperspray.

2. Leggings are sexy.
Leggings are inherently sexual and... well, see point number one. Make sure you hold the pepperspray nozzle pointed up and away from you.

3. Leggings are not sexy.
This is our interpretation of a piece of clothing. Kids are running around being kids and we the parents with all of our own collective baggage from living in a Christian fundamentalist Conservative puritanical patriarchal cesspool of sex-shaming, slut-shaming, and overall embarrassment of any and all things related to sex are blowing this whole thing way the hell out of proportion by sexualizing that which is not inherently sexual. Next year, the kids will have a new fashion trend and we’ll be getting hysterical over that.

4. We are the cause of the problem.
Do we teach our children about sex? No. Do we teach our children about relationships? No. Do we teach our children to be polite and respectful to other people? Maybe, but I am betting this is a lesson learned more by example than by anybody actually explaining this. In fact, I am betting the majority of us learn most of what we know about interacting with other people through observation plus trial and error. In other words, we are inadvertently passing on to the next generation a lot of things we did not consciously mean to pass on.

Now don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying everyone. A lot of people do a good job of parenting; not a perfect job, but a good one. And - this is an important point - once the kids get out into the world, they end up under the influence of their peer group and society in general. It’s a tough job being a parent.

But there is enough going wrong in society that I have to assume somebody somewhere is messing things up.

Laura Beck from the above quoted Jezebel article sums her take on all this with:
Nobody is arguing that middle school girls should get to go to school naked — but when they can't wear half the clothes that are on sale at Old Navy, it just doesn't cut it. These girls don't need to be taught to cover up or risk the unwanted interest of men or ire of authority figures; the whole school needs to learn that a girl's body is her own — and as long as she's not breaking any laws, she can dress it however she damn well pleases.

The idea of women being responsible
How deeply entrenched in our culture is this idea that women are the cause of sexual harassment, assault or even rape?

my blog: How to avoid sexual assault: Don't dress like a whore - Aug 30/2012
Krista Ford, the niece of Rob Ford the current major of Toronto, gets herself into hot water for tweeting advice on how to avoid sexual assault: "Stay alert, walk tall, carry mace, take self-defence classes & don’t dress like a whore. #DontBeAVictim #StreetSmart"

my blog: Slutwalk: Support our sluts! - May 9/2011
The Osgoode Hall Law School held a campus safety information session... Toronto Police Constable Michael Sanguinetti said, "You know, I think we’re beating around the bush here. I’ve been told I’m not supposed to say this, however, women should avoid dressing like sluts in order not to be victimized."

The idea of men being sexual predators
How deeply entrenched in our culture is this idea that men are out of control mindless sexual predators?

The Good Men Project - May 28/2013
The Danger in Demonizing Male Sexuality by Alyssa Royse
I live in Seattle, which is, by any standard, a very progressive city. Many of us do a mommy / daughter sex-ed class at Seattle Children’s Hospital as our daughters get close to starting menstruation. In the session of the class that is less about biology and more about navigating sexuality, the presenter offered the idea that girls would have to start learning how to say “no” to boys who were going to want to touch them sexually.

It starts that young. Yes, girls are told that boys are predatory and somehow out of control. The corollary there is that boys are told they are predators, and out of control. Therefore, not a desirable thing, but a thing to defend against. From the get-go, we are teaching our kids to fear male sexuality, and to repress female sexuality.

my blog: Steubenville Rape Case: It could be your daughter. - Jan 13/2013
After a summer evening of partying with over 50 people on August 11, 2012, two Steubenville football players stand accused of raping a 16 year old girl who was too drunk to resist including penetrating her with their fingers. While apparently this is not the first time the football team has been accused of sexual assault, social media has dramatically changed the situation by supplying both photographic and video evidence of possible criminal behaviour. The two boys currently under arrest actually posted nude photos of the girl and a video of them talking (or bragging) about it afterwards. An unknown boy is heard talking about one of the accused by saying, "He raped her harder than that cop raped Marcellus Wallace in Pulp Fiction."

The bigger issue is what's going on in our society. This type of situation has cropped up so many times that anybody who stands back and looks at the big picture has to ask themselves whether or not we fully grasp what's going on in society. You go to a party and see a girl who has made the mistake of drinking too much. What do you do? Try to help her out by sobering her up. See if she has a purse and try to find the telephone number of her parents and call them. Pull off her panties and insert your fingers in her vagina.

Aside: Don't tell me those two boys were born destined to do that. That is a learned behaviour. They were taught that. Or they were not taught to not do it.

Final Word
A young lady holds up a sign which reads, “My university teaches ‘How to avoid getting raped’ instead of ‘Don’t rape’ at freshman orientation.” The above two schools have passed on the message to their female students that they are responsible for the behaviour of boys. Is society the way it is and we must all accept the status quo? Are we in a shark tank? Or should we be trying to change the situation? Should we get rid of the sharks?

As I keep saying: Does a goldfish know it’s living in a fish bowl? Are we aware of our own circumstances? Are we aware of our own puritanism? Are we aware of our own sex-shaming and sexualization of God only knows what? Are we aware of how we see (and condone) boys and men as sexual predators? Are we aware of how we (sexually) subjugate women and hold them responsible for the bad behaviour of men?

"I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take this anymore!" Is society just the way it is and there’s nothing we can do about it? Or do we try? Do we try to make the world a better place? On the one hand, I’m optimistic. On the other hand, I’m a realist and have to add: Man, do we have a long way to go.


References

Wikipedia: Leggings
Leggings in the form of skin-tight trousers, a tighter version of the capris ending at mid-calf or near ankle length, made its way into fashion in the 1960s
...
By the early-1990s, leggings were actually outselling jeans in many parts of the United States.



I found the following images trying to make the distinction between bad leggings and good leggings. True? Or is this merely a subjective interpretation based on a particular moral standard?





And if I may, I will add the following about - yes, reflect on this - our "rape culture".








2014-05-15

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Wednesday 14 May 2014

How to Talk to Your Kids About Michael Sam

Michael Sam is the first openly gay to be drafted by an NFL team and the world demonstrates it has a long way to go to become tolerant. For some bizarre reason, sexual orientation is the end of civilisation but those doing the criticising completely forget the transgressions of supposed normal heterosexual people. Drugs, DUI, spousal abuse, the list goes on and on, but God forbid anybody be gay. Quite ironic, I would say. How ironic? The comedy troop Heck Bender have put together a short video clip which underlines just how stupid we all look in the big picture. Somebody's worried about sexual orientation? Good Lord, there are things in the world really really bad!

Published on May 11, 2014 by Heck Bender
How to Talk to Your Kids About Michael Sam (2:27)
Michael Sam was recently drafted by the St. Louis Rams, making him the first out gay professional football player. Clearly, your children are going to have some questions. We are here to help you.




References

Wikipedia: Michael Sam
Michael Alan Sam, Jr. (born January 7, 1990) is an American football defensive end for the St. Louis Rams of the National Football League (NFL).

After completing his college football career, Sam publicly came out as gay. He was selected by St. Louis in the seventh round, with the 249th overall pick, of the 2014 NFL Draft, becoming the first publicly gay player to be drafted in the league. If he plays in the league, he will also become the first active NFL player to have publicly come out.

Wikipedia: Homosexuality in American football
Few American football players have come out as gay. Six former National Football League (NFL) players have come out publicly after they retired. In college football, Division III player Conner Mertens came out as bisexual in January 2014, becoming the first active college football player at any level to publicly come out. There has never been an active Division I player who was publicly out. Former Division I player, Michael Sam, publicly came out in February 2014 after his college career. Later that year, he was selected by the St. Louis Rams in 2014 NFL Draft, and became the first publicly gay player drafted in the league. If he plays in the league, Sam could become the NFL's first active player who was publicly out.

Wikipedia: List of LGBT sportspeople
This is a list of notable lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender sportspeople. In American football, Michael Sam was the first ever to come out before being drafted by the St. Louis Rams in 2014, and only a few have after retiring.

The Guardian - May 12/2014
Michael Sam's big gay kiss will never be forgotten. That was the whole point by Cyd Zeigler
It was one thing to watch Michael Sam's name get called on Saturday afternoon, as the 249th pick in the NFL Draft. Even people who are against same-sex marriage could understand the symbolism of the first openly gay player in the biggest sport in the biggest country in the world.

It was another thing entirely for the world to watch, a few minutes later, as two men kissed. On the lips. Over and over. And over and over.

America will never be the same again.

Published on May 10, 2014 by JunkNews
Michael Sam Kiss: St Louis Rams 2014 Drafted First Openly Gay Football Player Michael Sam Kiss



my blog: Why are we talking about gay marriage? - Feb 7/2013
Think gays are bad? Take a look at what straight people are doing.



2014-05-14

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Tuesday 13 May 2014

Buzzfeed: Penis vs Vagina




Published on May 5, 2014 by BuzzFeedVideo
Penis vs Vagina
Let the battle begin.




References

Wikipedia: BuzzFeed
BuzzFeed is a website that combines a technology platform for detecting viral content with an editorial selection process to provide a snapshot of "the viral web in realtime". Co-founded in 2006 by Jonah Peretti (who is also cofounder of The Huffington Post), BuzzFeed is located in Manhattan, New York in the Flatiron District.

official web site: BuzzFeed

YouTube channel: BuzzFeedYellow

YouTube channel: BuzzFeedVideo

Despite my best efforts on Google, I couldn't find out the difference between BuzzFeedYellow and BuzzFeedVideo. Comedy versus serious? Original content versus other content? Beats me, but there they are. Enjoy.

2014-05-13

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Monday 12 May 2014

Rob Ford: more late night chuckles


Published on May 2, 2014 by The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
Rob Ford Heading to Rehab -- Monologue (4:44)
Jimmy Fallon's monologue from Thursday, May 1. Part 1 of 3.



Published on May 2, 2014 by Late Show with David Letterman
David Letterman - Top Ten Reasons Rob Ford Is Taking a Leave of Absence (2:19)
"Top Ten Reasons Rob Ford Is Taking a Leave of Absence" from May 1, 2014.



Published on May 10, 2014 by Washington Post
Headline: Late night laughs: Rob Ford rehab edition (1:28)
When troubled Toronto Mayor Rob Ford headed to rehab, late night comedians went to the mics. Check out how Jimmy Kimmel, Jimmy Fallon, David Letterman, Seth Meyers and Conan take on the latest round of Rob Ford news.



Published on May 8, 2014 by Jimmy Kimmel Live
The Biggest Mayor (2:33)
Toronto Mayor Rob Ford recently put his re-election efforts on hold to enter rehab for substance abuse. He claims he's learning a lot about himself there, working out every day and eating right. He even told his brother he's planning to come back a few pounds lighter and if you don't believe it, here's proof.



Published on May 6, 2014 by LittleDragon77
Jon Stewart on Rob Ford Smoking Crack Again (May 2014) New Video (4:45)
Jon Stewart's take on the newest leaked videos of Toronto's Mayor Rob Ford, smoking crack, and in another drunken stupor. Rob Ford takes leave to get rehab.



Rex Murphy is a commentator for CBC's flagship news broadcast The National.

Published on May 1, 2014 by The National
Rex Murphy: Toronto Mayor Rob Ford (3:11)
Point of View: Rex Murphy's take on the new Rob Ford revelations.



Published on May 1, 2014 by The Young Turks
NEW Video Of Toronto Mayor Rob Ford Smoking Crack (4:42)
"A second video of Toronto Mayor Rob Ford smoking what has been described as crack cocaine by a self-professed drug dealer was secretly filmed in his sister's basement early Saturday morning.



2014-05-12

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